258 - Halloween 6 (1995) & Halloween Ends (2022) →

CW: Rape, Incest, Suicide, Domestic Violence

It’s Halloween Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey watch some pretty bad Halloween movies, unfortunately. There is yelling.

Get more on Patreon! Read our afterthoughts for this episode HERE!

The Classic Film: Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
"Six years after Michael Myers last terrorized Haddonfield, he returns there in pursuit of his niece, Jamie Lloyd, who has escaped with her newborn child, for which Michael and a mysterious cult have sinister plans” (IMDb.com). It happened. We've been mostly forgiving of the Halloween sequels, but 6—with its magic runes and nonsense plot—is absolutely the worst.

The Modern Film: Halloween Ends (2022)
"The saga of Michael Myers and Laurie Strode comes to a spine-chilling climax in this final installment of this trilogy” (IMDb.com). Despite giving us something we didn't know we needed (a smiling Laurie Strode), Halloween Ends decides to cap off the entire series by being mostly about some brand new character you don't like killing a bunch of other people you don't like.

Audio Sources:
"Awakening: Part 1" (Gargoyles S01E01) produced by Disney Television Animation
"Halloween" (1978) produced by Compass International Pictures, et al.
"Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers" produced by Miramax, et al.
"Halloween Ends" produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" produced by View Askew Productions, et al.
"Léon: The Professional" produced by Gaumont, et al.
"Liar Liar" produced by Universal Pictures & Imagine Entertainment
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Split" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.

244 - Double Feature - Firestarter (1984 & 2022) →

CW: Child Abuse, Harm to Animals

It’s Firestarter Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey try a double helping of the Stephen King adaptation and start bleeding from all sorts of places.

Read our afterthoughts for this episode HERE!

The Original: Firestarter (1984)
"A couple who participated in a potent medical experiment gain telepathic ability and then have a child who is pyrokinetic” (IMDb.com). Some wonky bits aside, an absolutely stacked cast turns out one of (in our minds) the actually good Stephen King adaptations.

The Remake: Firestarter (2022)
"A young girl tries to understand how she mysteriously gained the power to set things on fire with her mind” (IMDb.com). Compared to the book and the original film, this remake just doesn't stand up. But if you watch it first, you may think it's alright.

Audio Sources:
"Firestarter" (1984) produced by Dino De Laurentiis Company & Universal Pictures
"Firestarter" (2022) produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Firestarter" written by Liam Howlett, et al., and performed by The Prodigy
"Hot Cold Sodas and Cold Hot Popcorn" by Nuthacker
"The Langoliers" (1995 TV Miniseries) produced by Laurel Entertainment Inc., et al.
"Old School" produced by Dreamworks Pictures & The Montecito Picture Company
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith" produced by Lucasfilm, et al.
"Stephen King's IT" (1990 TV Miniseries) produced by Green/Epstein Productions, et al.

207 - Halloween 5 (1989) & Halloween Kills (2021) →

CW: Suicide

It’s Halloween on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey continue with the most retconned horror franchise in history with Halloween 5, the last okay entry in the original series, before moving on and all the good will from 2018's Halloween is sucked out of them watching its follow-up, the brand new and superbly awful Halloween Kills.

Read our afterthoughts for this episode here!

The Classic Film: Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
"One year after the events of Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers, the Shape returns to Haddonfield once again in an attempt to kill his now-mute niece” (IMDb.com). Look, it isn't as bad as everyone says. Yes, it teases a sharp turn toward garbage in the next installment and it's not a great movie, but there's still some quality stuff here.

The Modern Film: Halloween Kills (2021)
"The saga of Michael Myers and Laurie Strode continues in the next thrilling chapter of the Halloween series” (IMDb.com). Well, they've lost the plot. This follow-up to the admirably great 2018 refresh is so fan-servicey that it's hard for a fan to actually enjoy. It wouldn't be so bad if it were at least competent... but it's not. This is one of the biggest dips in quality since Part II in 1981. At least Carpenter's soundtrack is still pretty good?

Audio Sources:
"GOT'EEEEMM!!!!!" via WelvenDaGreat @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4v8ek9TEeOU
"Half in the Bag: Halloween Kills" via RedLetterMedia @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K71JAJMWeco
"Halloween" produced by Compass International Pictures, et al.
"Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers" produced by Magnum Pictures, et al.
"Halloween Kills" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.
"Happy Gilmore" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.
"Jamie Lee Curtis Spills Details on New 'Halloween’ Film" via SiriusXM @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjvI5rBlfbA
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"A Picture Is Worth 1,000 Bucks" (Family Guy S02E11) produced by Fuzzy Door Productions, et al.
"The Rap Battle (PARODY) (ORIGINAL) OHHH!" via SUPAHOTFIRE DESHAWN @ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iu90z9Akxgk
"Spider-Man" (2002) produced by Columbia Pictures, et al.

159 - Halloween 4 (1988) & Halloween (2018) →

CW: Mental Illness

Read our afterthoughts for this episode here!

It’s Halloween on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey come alive and go on the hunt for evil!

The Classic Film: Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)
"Ten years after his original massacre, the invalid Michael Myers awakens on Halloween Eve and returns to Haddonfield to kill his seven-year-old niece. Can Dr. Loomis stop him?” (IMDb.com). Since audiences rejected the idea of a different Halloween-themed story in each installment of the franchise, Halloween 4 brings back Michael Myers to hunt his bloodline... again! We haven't gotten to the druids yet and Danielle Harris is a gem, so this one just barely manages to eke by as acceptable.

The Modern Film: Halloween (2018)
"Laurie Strode confronts her long-time foe Michael Myers, the masked figure who has haunted her since she narrowly escaped his killing spree on Halloween night four decades ago” (IMDb.com). Rejecting all franchise lore except for the original, Halloween (2018) kickstarts the FIFTH Halloween timeline with a modern bang. Although it's not saying much, this entry easily takes the honor of best Halloween sequel.

Audio Sources:
"Carrie" (1976) produced by Red Bank Films
"Doctor Sleep" (Audiobook) written by Stephen King and read by Will Patton
"Halloween" (1978) produced by Compass International Pictures, et al.
"Halloween" (2018) produced by Night Blade Holdings, et al.
"Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers" produced by Trancas International Films
"The Italian Job" (2003) produced by Paramount Pictures, et al.
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"The Wizard of Oz" (1939) produced by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer

104 - The Fog (1980) & The Mist (2007) →

CW: Suicide

Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1178074557611003904

It’s Condensation Week on Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey discover something in the fog and probably confuse Carpenter and King classics! Thanks to listener Anthony for the recommendation!

The Classic Film: The Fog (1980)
"An unearthly fog rolls into a small coastal town exactly 100 years after a ship mysteriously sank in its waters” (IMDb.com). Following up on their first film together (Halloween), John Carpenter and Debra Hill team up again to make another great horror movie in a completely different style. This time, an ensemble cast have to find their own way through the fog to stop… vengeful leper pirates? Wait, that can’t be right...

The Modern Film: The Mist (2007)
"A freak storm unleashes species of bloodthirsty creatures on a small town, where a small band of citizens hole up in a supermarket and fight for their lives” (IMDb.com). This Stephen King adaptation (directed by Frank Darabont, probably the most successful King adaptor) not only has one of the most notorious endings in horror cinema history, but also incredible creature designs and gruesomely impactful gore. Are those enough to get over the cliched characters, wonky CGI, and muddled themes? Chris and Kelsey disagree.

Get more at podsematary.com!

Audio Sources:
"The Cat and the Claw Part II" (Batman: The Animated Series S01E08) produced by Warner Bros. Animation
“The Exorcist” produced by Warner Bros. & Hoya Productions
“The Fog” (1980) produced by Debra Hill Productions, et al.
“Halloween” (1978) produced by Compass International Pictures
“The Mist” produced by Dimension Films, et al.
“Move Bitch” written by J. Smith, et al. and performed by Ludacris feat. Mystikal & I-20
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"Soul and Mind" performed by E's Jammy Jams
"The Stand" produced by Greengrass Productions & Laurel Entertainment Inc."Tales from the Mist: Inside 'The Fog'" produced by Automat Pictures
"The Thing" (1982) produced by Universal Pictures & Turman-Foster Company
"WNEW FM Opening 5 - 2 - 77” performed by Alison Steele

077 - They Live (1988) & Signs (2002) →

CW: Antisemitism, Racism, Mass Shooting

The aliens have invaded Pod Sematary! Chris & Kelsey discuss two films with radically different perspectives during an alien invasion!

The Classic Film: They Live (1988)
"A drifter discovers a pair of sunglasses that allow him to wake up to the fact that aliens have taken over the Earth" (IMDb). Can a fight scene go on TOO long? Can a man be TOO rowdy? Can a Keith be TOO David? The answer to all of these questions is "Hell no."

The Modern Film: Signs (2002)
"A family living on a farm finds mysterious crop circles in their fields which suggests something more frightening to come" (IMDb). One of Shyamalan's "Good Ones," this movie proves that, in capable hands, a story about a family in mourning can be more compelling than the alien invasion during which it's set.

Plus:
--Supernatural Check-In!
--WAY too much wrestling!
--Nazi Punks Fuck Off!
--Two separate Harry Potter references!
--R.I.P. Larry Cohen!

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts about this episode at twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1109992816158007296

Audio Sources:
"Carry On Wayward Son" written by Kerry Livgren and performed by Kansas
"Clerks" produced by View Askew Productions & Miramax
"The Final Countdown" (The IT Crowd S04E02) produced by Talkback Thames & Channel 4 Television Corporation
"The Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show" (The Simpsons S08E14) produced by Gracie Films & 20th Century Fox Television
"Jordan Peele Breaks Down 'Get Out' Fan Theories from Reddit | Vanity Fair" via Vanity Fair @ www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBvcngHRTFg
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"S&M Present" (Robot Chicken S01E09) produced by Stoopid Monkey, et al.
"Scott Pilgrim vs. the World" produced by Universal Pictures, et al.
"Signs" produced by Touchstone Pictures, et al.
"They Live" produced by Alive Films & Larry Franco Productions
"WWE: 'Rowdy' Roddy Piper - 'The Green Hills Of Tyrol' - Official & Final Theme Song" via TheAlfaOriginal @ www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3WG0e1Ts58

056 - Double Feature - Halloween II (1981 & 2009) →

It's that time of year again: Halloween Week on Pod Sematary! Each year on Halloween, Chris and Kelsey plan to bring you the next installment in this classic franchise! This year, it's a Double Feature of the 1981 follow-up to the original and the second Rob Zombie installment that definitely isn't a remake.

First it's the classic Halloween II from 1981! Laurie has been moved to the Haddonfield Memorial Hospital after the events of the first movie and Michael Meyers is still on the lamb. Thrill as hospital staff walk down hallways! Join us for John Carpenter and Debra Hill's final word on Michael Meyers -- he's never coming back after this one, folks!

Then it's on to Rob Zombie's 2009 sequel, H2: Halloween II! This movie is chock-a-block full of Zombie cliches, but is it possible that it's actually better than the 1981 version? Find out what got Chris to say, "Like Icarus, he approaches greatness!"

Get more at podsematary.com! Read afterthoughts for this episode at twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1056678173612494848

Audio Sources:
"Black Christmas" (1974) produced by August Films, et al.
"A Clockwork Orange" produced by Warner Bros. and Hawk Films
"Halloween" (1978) produced by Compass International Pictures and Falcon International Productions
"Halloween II" (1981) produced by Dino De Laurentiis Company and Universal Pictures
"Halloween II" (2009) produced by Dimension Films, et al.
"Halloween III: Season of the Witch" produced by Dino De Laurentiis Company and Universal Pictures 
"John Carpenter Plays the Halloween Theme on Nintendo Labo… Kind Of" via IGN @ www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIRG6reVYLs
"Mr. Sandman" written by Pat Ballard and performed by The Chordettes
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Whirly Brains" (SpongeBob SquarePants S10E01) produced by United Plankton Pictures
"The Worst Witch" produced by Central Independent Television

055 - Double Feature - 13 Ghosts (1960) & Thir13en Ghosts (2001) →

CW: Rape

Worst of 2017/18 - #5 Thir13en Ghosts (2001)

It's round two on Dark Castle Double Features this week on Pod Sematary! Chris and Kelsey go back to the same William Castle well as The House on Haunted Hill with Thirteen Ghosts! And stick around at the end of the episode for our thoughts on 2018's Halloween!

First up is the 1960 original, 13 Ghosts! Ghosts come to life with the ectoplasmic color of Illusion-O (ectoplasm only comes in red or blue)! Imagine 1959's House on Haunted Hill but without the intrigue and without Vincent Price... it's fine... it's fine.

But, then... oh, then... there's the 2001 Dark Castle remake, Thir13en Ghosts. A movie so batshit crazy that Matthew Lillard is the only one that can see it for what it really is: an ironic comedy.

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1053869938144796673

Audio Sources:
"13 Ghosts" produced by William Castle Productions
"The Cabin in the Woods" produced by Lionsgate, et al.
"Excess" written and produced by Tricky and performed by Tricky w/ Alanis Morissette
"The Fly" (1986) SLM Production Group & Brooksfilms
"Halloween" (2018) produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.
"Mirror Mirror" written and performed by Rah Digga
"Orgazmo" produced by Orgazmo inc., et al.
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"Thir13en Ghosts" produced by Dark Castle Entertainment, et al.

044 - Double Feature - The Thing (1982 & 2011) →

It's a Thing Double Feature this week on Pod Sematary and it's not at all confusing!

First up, Chris & Kelsey tackle that amazing original-- no, wait... remake? Does The Thing From Another World count as the original? No, screw it. Chris & Kelsey tackle THE ORIGINAL John Carpenter classic from 1982: The Thing! Sure, it's a classic now, but it wasn't always so beloved; have we just been watching with rose-tinted glasses?

Then it's on to the sequel-- no, wait... remake? No, wait... prequel. Then it's on to the premakequel from 2011 starring Mary Elizabeth Winstead! It's perfectly alright but ultimately forgettable and unnecessary. Are we just way off base here?

But that's not all! At the end of the episode, stick around for some Castle Rock talk! We discuss our thoughts on the first three episodes of the new Stephen King series and there's no restraint on spoilers. We each throw out a prediction on events to come, so be sure to share yours, too!

Plus!
--Manly Men
--The bottom of the Uncanny Valley
--Tormund Giantsbane
--#diabeetus
--Discussion on how trailers undermine a film literally 100% of the time
--A primer on how Netflix works and why all of their original horror films are bad

Get more at podsematary.com! Read our afterthoughts for this episode at https://twitter.com/PodSematary/status/1024371768033665024 

Audio Sources: 
"Pet Sematary" written by Dee Dee Ramone & Daniel Rey and performed by The Ramones
"Science Fiction/Double Feature" written by Richard O'Brien & Richard Hartley and performed by Joan Jett and the Blackhearts
"The Thing" (1982) (incl. Commentary with John Carpenter and Kurt Russell) produced by Universal Pictures & Turman-Foster Company
Thing
"The Thing" (2011) produced by Morgan Creek Entertainment Group, et al.

043 w/ Bob Ramos - Christine (1983) & Oculus (2013) →

It's Material Possessions Week on Pod Sematary and we have our first guest ever! It's Howdy Price from Championship Wrestling from Hollywood and the voice of Full Moon Features' Gingerdead Man: Bob Ramos!

First up is a personal favorite of Chris & Kelsey: the haunted car movie of all haunted car movies, John Carpenter and Stephen King's Christine from 1983! We absolutely love this movie and you will, too. It's over 20 years old so it's officially an antique!

Then it's on to the criminally underrated Oculus from 2013. This movie is the first foray into American cinema for Guardians of the Galaxy's Nebula, Karen Gillan. It didn't get nearly enough credit when it came out and it seemed to disappear pretty quickly. Don't let it pass you by again!

Audio Sources:
"Beach Blanket Bunker: The Untold Story of Hitler & His Prize Surfboard" (Conan, 9/27/12 S02E146) produced by Conaco
"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" produced by De Laurentiis Entertainment Group (DEG), et al.
"The Brave Little Toaster" produced by Hyperion Pictures, et al.
"Christine" produced by Columbia Pictures, et al.
"Christine/Silkwood/Sudden Impact/Thriller" (At the Movies with Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert S02E13) produced by Tribune Entertainment
"Guardians of the Galaxy" produced by Marvel Enterprises, et al.
"M1 A1" written by John S. Harrison Jr., Damon Albarn, & Jamie Hewlett and performed by Gorillaz
"Oculus" produced by Blumhouse Productions, et al.